Weekend Alone

Kevin and I had a wonderful weekend alone. No kids. No tantrums. No fighting. It was heaven. The kids spent the weekend with my mom and step-dad. It was the first time that we have been alone since Lauren was born. I must say, though, when my mom was driving away with the kids, I cried. It didn't help that Lauren started crying when Kevin was putting her in the carseat. It's normal, I cried the first time that Curtis went to stay with my mom for the weekend. Anyway, Kevin and I finally went to the movies, woo hoo!! We saw The Mummy and boy was that a good movie, lots of action. We also went to storage to get my maternity clothes, since I no longer fit into my pants! We finally got Lauren a carseat, so that we can move her out of the infant carrier. Yes, I said infant carrier. My little girl is small. At her 12 month check up, she weighed a little over 18 lbs, so the doctor told us to keep her in the infant carrier. We are really looking forward to putting her in the new car seat, she is getting heavy. Curtis is looking forward to Halloween so that he can go to our church's Harvest Fair and go in the bounce house. Curtis is going to be Buzz Lightyear again (no surprise there), and Lauren is going to wear Curtis's old Squirt costume. They are going to look cute. I will post pictures next week.

Party of Five

Well the cat is out of the bag, thanks to Curtis, so I might as well post that we are expanding our family. I am nine weeks pregnant and the baby is due May 26th. I have been feeling very nauseous, so I'm looking forward to this part being over. The kids went with me to my doctors appointment and Curtis was very fascinated by the ultrasound and Lauren pointed to the screen and said, "baby". Curtis has already told me that we are having a girl, so we'll see. God will give us what we need. I would love another boy, but will gladly love whatever He blesses us with.

Family Time

We took a trip up to Oak Glen this weekend for the apple harvest. We had fun, but boy it was chilly. We went with my grandparents in their motor home, which Curtis thought was the coolest. We bought some apples and cider, which are delicious. I highly recommend going up there it is really cool. We are planning on going back up there so that we can see some more of the orchards. Here are some pictures from our trip:

Lauren helping herself to an apple

Curtis helping Lauren finish her apple

When The Tears Fall

Eleven weeks doesn't seem like enough time to fall in love with someone, especially someone you've never met. For me, eleven weeks was plenty of time to fall in love with someone that I won't get the privilege to meet until I get to Heaven. This Sunday, October 12th is the four year anniversary of the miscarriage of my first pregnancy. It's hard to believe that four years have passed since that fateful day that I learned my baby was no longer living. It's still so fresh in my mind, it seems like it just happened yesterday... It was a Tuesday morning and I wasn't feeling very well. I went to work and just felt like I was going to start my period, I was cramping so bad. I went to the bathroom and discovered that I was spotting. I called my doctor and told him what was going on and he told me to go to the hospital so they could do an ultrasound. I called Kevin and told him what was going on, so I went home to get Kevin and we went to the hospital. I just knew that something was wrong, but I was praying that everything was okay. The ultrasound technician confirmed my fears when she got very quiet and just stared at the screen. I started crying when she said that she was sorry, but the baby had stopped growing and she could only see a yolk sack. I was sent back to the exam room and told that it would probably take my body two weeks to complete the miscarriage process. Two weeks! What! I always thought that miscarriage was a quick thing. I didn't want to go through this for two weeks. Well it didn't take two weeks, it took three and another trip to the ER in an ambulance. Two weeks into the ordeal, I started to have contractions and bleeding really bad. After an hour of bleeding through my pads and clothes, I told Kevin that we needed to go to the hospital. I started to get real nauseous, so we grabbed a bucket and headed to the car. I got about half way down the hall and I felt like I was going to pass out. Things started to get black and fuzzy, so I told Kevin to call 911. I grabbed the wall and slid down to the floor. Kevin told me later that for a brief moment he thought that I was going to die because I was so pale. Anyway, we get to the hospital and the doctor hooks me up to an I.V. to start me on Morphine and tells me that he's never seen anyone bleed this bad. Lucky me... Well apparently there was a piece of tissue stuck in my cervix and my body was trying to get rid of it. So the doctor got it out and gave me some medication to take when I got home and I just stayed in bed. After all that, I still bled for the next week, talk about tramatic. Going back to work was the worst because one of my coworkers was pregnant as well and we were due on the same day. What a test of faith for me. I sure did have a lot of questions for God in those days, especially why? I still don't know why, but you know, it doesn't matter because if everything would've been okay with that pregnancy, Curtis wouldn't be here. (I got pregnant with him 6 weeks after). I also want to share a song with you that helped me get through it. It still makes me cry when I hear it. It's from the Newsboys off of their Devotion album and it's called When The Tears Fall

I've had questions

without answers

I've known sorrow

I have known pain

But there's one thing

That I'll cling to

You're faithful

Jesus, you're true

Chorus:

When hope is lost

I'll call you Savior

When pain surrounds

I'll call you Healer

When silence falls

You'll be the song within my heart

In the lone hour

Of my sorrow

Through the darkest

Night of my soul

You surround me

And sustain me

My Defender

Forever more

Chorus

And I will praise you

I will praise you

When the tears fall

Still I will sing to you

I will praise you

Jesus, praise you

Through the suffering

Still I will sing

That is my heartsong, folks, pure and simple. Thank you for taking this stroll down memory lane with me. Have a wonderful week.

Family Fun

We went to the fair again this weekend and boy was it hot! I really don't like walking around in the heat, especially with little ones, but we had fun anyway. Curtis got to pet some animals this time. He petted a snake (only after I touched it), a bunny, a goat, and a chick. He also got to ride the pony again. We got to see some old hot rods and we had to see the trains. Lauren got her first taste of Chinese food, which she loved, but then again, Lauren will eat just about anything! Lauren is walking all over now and she has learned how to stand herself up when she falls. I can't believe how fast the kids are growing! Oh, Lauren now likes to screech/scream. Yesterday, we were going to pick up Kevin at work and the whole time I was driving, she was playing with her dolly and screeching. She is such a girl! Here are some pictures from the fair: